from mechele

From the moment the Officer said "roll-up", Ive been in a dream!
My first week out flew by. At first it was a little stressful and overwhelming with stimuli.
A friend flew in and was with Barbra waiting at the door.
My first trip to the store, I searched the car floor board for my electronic monitoring transmitter box. The year I spent out on bail with the ankle monitor, I was required to carry a little black box with me at all times. If I were out of range, it would beep. After realizing my pre-rescue, pre-bail, pre-trial programming was not at all adjusted well, what could I do but laugh. I just got the desired mango and avocado. The idea of venturing through the aisles was not at all an option yet. As I was checking out, the cashiers register was beeping as the fruit passed through, once again I checked for my black transmitter box. It’s been two and a half years and I have never once thought about that little box. It’s comical how surroundings trigger reactions.
Barbra was so thoughtful. She had thought of everything ahead of time. I don’t know if I could have adjusted so well without her. She is affectionately protective and bold. I love her and am very thankful for her and her zest.
Colin and Audrey flew in and we stayed up all night giggling the first night. We were silly with excitement and disbelief. Still, after a week I grab Audrey and yes, sniff her, like a mamma lion, she is mine. The little one and I are snuggled tightly. I don’t let go of her, even when she tries to shake her little paw from mine, I hold tighter, and we laugh.
I made an old favorite on a roaring gas stove with a sizzling cast iron skillet—my favs! I missed the sizzle sounds and smells of cooking real, good food( without the use of the microwave and iron). Audrey was so sweet when she took her first bite of my peanut sauce; she smiled and said I remember this taste. OHHH! Melt my heart. I love watching her eat what I made for her.
I washed dishes. Yes a mundane task which I found so much joy in. I was using the big kitchen sink, with a real sponge (not a dinky bathroom sink with paper towel). Oh, and the feel and sound of real glass, and ceramic, and metal flatware! Wow! Yes, I found joy in that.
I still look for the iron to toast my croissant, or pause at the microwave, contemplating how to cook the asparagus---never!
I hear so much. I never heard traffic, horns, or sirens for two and a half years. Still more joy to be had. I am thankful for it all.
When we were in the grocery a little tiny person ran into us and scattered about underfoot as the mother apologized and attempted to catch the speedy little sprite. I smile and loved it. I felt a little weepy for a second. I really missed little people. I know it’s not socially acceptable to pick up someone’s baby and cuddle them but I have to admit I see them and the urge strikes, it’s so tempting. They have so much happiness and spunk. We should all run about like that. :-)